Tuesday, February 28, 2006

That's just my baby's mama!

The lady checking out in front of me at the grocery store today was probably around my age. She had a 4 month old baby in her cart and was apparently 2 months pregnant again. That lady's been busy! She is seriously going to have her hands full.


I start my work at the PD's office tomorrow. I wasn't really nervous or anything until yesterday. I called my boss to see what time I should arrive and about parking, etc.

He informed me that I've already gotten ASSIGNED SOME CASES!!! AHHH! That seriously freaks me out as I have NO clue what I'm doing. The amount of information I knew about criminal law after my clinics and internships has long dissipated. All that knowledge needed to be removed from my brain and replaced with corporations, commercial paper and other scary subjects for the Bar.

So now it's been almost 10 months since I graduated law school, well over a year since I've done anything criminal law related and I don't remember much. Man how I would not want to be one of my clients right now!

I'm sure a lot of stuff will come back to me but having cases assigned to me before I've even shown up is quite scary. Also, my boss won't be back into the office until next Monday so my 1st 3 days I'm not 100% sure what I'll be doing. I guess I'll try to latch onto one of the other lawyers in the office :)

Hm....maybe I'll try to learn some law today. Eek!

Sunday, February 26, 2006


Last night when I was out I got puked on! YUCK!! It was a semi-friend of mine who with no warning at all (no statement like "I'm going to get sick" or "My tummy is hurting"- not a word) puts her hand up to her mouth and vomits sprays out of her mouth sadly hitting my jeans :(

I've never actually been puked on before. I've had my feet hit with puke and have thrown up myself many a time but last night was definitely a first. Hopefully a last also!

Friday, February 24, 2006

I'll Think about It

Apparently last summer, while I was studying for the bar, a real estate agent who lives in my parents neighborhood asked my dad if I would be interested in cleaning some bathrooms as a job.

My dad was quite confused as to 1. why this lady would be asking me and 2. what bathrooms I would even have been cleaning.

Needless to say, I declined the offer but I figure if this whole law thing doesn't work out like I hope at least I'll have something to fall back on!

Thursday, February 23, 2006

Driver's license

Since I have a week off before I start my new job, I have been running a ton of errands. Yesterday, I went to the DMV to renew my license. I can't understand a word the guy is saying to me based on this thick Irish accent.

So I am apparently unaware when he's going to snap my picture. I'm not the most photogenic person in the world either so I already have that going against me. He snaps and I'm not really smiling. It's more of that scary smile fading look that could scare small children coupled with a lovely double chin. I don't actually have a double chin but the angle of the camera has apparently created a shadow which looks like I have 2 chins! Great! I'll have that picture to show everyone for the next 5 years!

Tuesday, February 21, 2006

Not a Singing Canary

OK so LO picked out her bridesmaids dresses for everyone and thankfully didn't pick yellow. Thank God! The dress she picked is horrible, you can only buy it online and online has sold out of many sizes. Luckily Lisa had ordered 2 sizes and I could take one of them that "fit" me (which worked out since the size I needed had sold out online).

So I try on the dress at LO's since I wasn't sure what size I would be. I try on the dress and it's pretty ugly. But the weird part is that LO doesn't really like anything about the dress. So my question is why did you pick this dress?

The dress is "tea length" which means it should fall about midcalf (which was clear from the picture online). So I try it on and that's where it hits me. I am then informed that LO thought the dress would be shorter. She wants the dress to be kneelength so I will need to get it hemmed to be kneelength. OK fine...will do... though it could expensive since the dress has a sheer overlay.

The dress also has a "deep v-neck" which the picture online showed clearly. So the dress on me is very low cut. I was showing a massive amount a cleavage (and truthfully I don't have all that much to show anyway). The dress is just made and described as having a very deep plunging v. I was informed that I will also need to get the top altered. I'm not really sure what she meant b/c the top fit how it was suppose to and there isn't any excess material on the top to remove or lift the dress in anyway. So aside from completely remaking the dress it would be impossible to control the deep v. So....no I wouldn't be getting that altered and the girls will be on display (though Lisa has a DD so hers will seriously be on display).

The best part of the dress though I had the pleasure of discovering. After I paid Lisa $140+ for the dress I brought it home and was trying it on for my mom. I went into my mom's room and was standing in front of the full length mirror and there was a very small amount of light coming from the window like seriously only my feet were actually in the sun and it was 5pm. THE DRESS IS SEE THROUGH ON THE BOTTOM!! You could see everything my legs and my pink panties clear as day. Thankfully I noticed this before showing my fiance's family all my goods at the wedding. So i will be investing in a black slip!

My fiance while at LO's offered me to sing at her wedding. Issue: I don't want to sing at her wedding or any weddings. The way my fiance approached this made it appear like I really wanted to sing at her wedding and had been talking about it. When in fact this came out of the blue and was odd since my fiance has never actually heard me sing (besides just goofing around--i do a Pavarotti impression). Hopefully I won't be asked to sing since I would feel quite uncomfortable doing that in my see through dress!

Friday, February 17, 2006

I ain't werkin here no more

This is my last day of document reviewing baby! Very exciting!

So now I will be singing "Take this Job and Shove It" from Office Space (which may be the best movie ever!).

Thursday, February 16, 2006

Looking good?

Many guys out there are doing this look that I just don't get. Everyday I see younger guys dressed in full suits, with the long overcoat and then a backpack. This backpack is usually old, stuffed to the brim and sticks out from their backs almost a foot. I don't get this. The bookbag always seems to pull at their overcoat and cause that to look odd too. It seems to negate the professional look and instead make them look like kids playing dress up.

I mean if I hired a lawyer or accountant and then saw him walking to the metro sporting this look, it would make me question my decision.

Maybe instead they could try a messenger bag this would still have a masculine look to it and still look professional.

Wednesday, February 15, 2006

Thank you landlord!

The Landlord sent over a plumber and the bathroom is now functioning!

2 Days Left!

2 Days left (not including today)!! Wohooo!!

Note: toilet still not working and nothing has really been done to remedy the situation with the except of this morning calling the Landlord. Yet Law Moron (girl) was shocked this morning the toilet didn't magically fix itself over night.

Tuesday, February 14, 2006

A solo cup? Really?

So today in the one bedroom apartment I work in until Friday!! Wohoo! Anyway, someone clogged up the toilet and never told anyone. Left it for Law Dancer to find and accidentally overflow the toilet.

Guy Moron decides since we don't have a plunger (instead of going and buying a plunger) to attach a solo cup filled with paper towels to the end of a toilet brush to unclog it. Obviously, this fails.

So he finally decides to buy a plunger and now has the inability to get the toilet up and running.

Problem: I have to pee and we have no toilet!! Beautiful! Friday...just got to make it to Friday!

More from Moron

Law Moron now says that we shouldn't be reading the documents or going through them page by page. It's apparently not cost effective.

Now, as a document coder this came as news to me. Silly me, for the last 6 months I've actually been reading the documents page by page! I was apparently under the mistaken impression that was my job. Silly Blonde Law!


Actually said in office today:

Law Moron (girl supervisor): Do you file a lien with the UCC?

Monday, February 13, 2006

PD's Office Here I Come!!

Well it's nearly official that on March 1st I will begin a job as a public defender! All I have left to do next week is fill out the paperwork.

I am very excited not only to finally be able to begin my career but also to kiss the apartment goodbye. Friday is officially my last day! So only 4 days left of document coding...sweet!

Friday, February 10, 2006

Valentine's Day

I have no clue what to get my fiance for Valentine's Day! I am not a big fan of the day in general so I don't want to go too overboard. The issue is I'm fresh out of good ideas. Plus, we will be celebrating being together for 6 years (damn that makes me feel old!) the following week and then his birthday is the 1st week in March. So I have to come up with a ton of ideas soon and I'm drawing a blank.

I need to come up with something soon! Hmm...

Tuesday, February 07, 2006

Eau de Urine

This woman who sat by me on the metro today had this sickening smell of urine with a hint of BO. Any movement of the train or her resulted in near vomiting by me.

Saturday, February 04, 2006

Do What?

I'm a bridesmaid in my fiance's sister's (LO) wedding this coming summer. Her wedding is at the end of July and she is currently trying to narrow down her decision on bridesmaid dresses. Which is understandable since she probably needs to make a decision soon. She also is debating between yellow dresses or black dresses. Needless to say, I'm rooting for black. Since I have blonde hair, blue eyes and a fair complexion yellow looks quite horrible on me (read: slightly jaundice).

Today, after our dance lessons, my fiance had to run to coach his basketball team so I was getting a rid home with LO and her fiance (AW). We decided to meet LO's parents to grab a pizza.

While we were there, LO has apparently decided against going with bridesmaids dresses at bridal boutiques and was thinking more of getting something at J-Crew, Nordstrom or Lord and Taylor. The problem with this idea is LO's never seen the dresses since they are only carried online. So she's talking about these dresses and says Lisa (her maid of honor) was going to order one of the dresses in a few sizes to see what they looked like.

She says to me "maybe you could go ahead and order one or 2 of the dresses in different sizes so I can see what they look like."

Me Externally: silent and take drink of water and continuing drinking water until she starts talking again.
Me Internally: WTF!!!

LO: "We wouldn't have to pay shipping or handling since if you order in the store its free and then you can just return it for a full refund. I really like the Nordstrom one in yellow so we should order them in multiple colors too."

Me Externally: take massive mouthful of pizza and act like I'm chewing until someone else starts talking.
Me Internally: You are seriously smoking some crack if you think I'm going to be doing that.

OK. Maybe I'm overreacting and being a heinous bridesmaid. It's quite possible. But I just can't imagine asking someone to do that. It's quite rude.

First off, it's not my wedding and I'm not a rich person. Secondly, the lowest priced dress $140 but most are closer to $200. So really, if I did that (which I'm not going to) I'd be putting close to $400 on my credit card minimum. What the hell?? And that's assuming I have the available credit, since currently I still have a lot of credit card debt from school and what not. I probably do have the available credit to be able to put a few dresses on my credit card, but I don't have the money (since I'm not sure how likely it is I could be able to order the dress, get it, return it and have the money credited back to me w/in 1 billing cycle) to cover the expenses of these dresses.

I have already gone to try on dresses at bridal boutiques and would be more than willing to try them on when they got shipped here. I just feel like this is her wedding so if she wants to see them then she should put them on her credit card.

It also kinda sucked because she asked me in front of her parents so I didn't really want to say no or discuss my finances with them.

I think I will just be avoiding the situation and if she brings it up again I will say I can't for financial reasons. But hopefully if I avoid the situation, it will go away!

Friday, February 03, 2006

Tic Tacs

I have an obsession with Tic Tacs. It might be bordering on a problem. I love them and eat them all day like they are candy.

Due to the addictive nature of my personality, if I open a box I have to finish the entire thing. If there is a box near me, I must open it and begin eating it. If I don't open the box, all I can think about is opening the box and how badly I want them until I finally give in and eat them. Recently I even bought them in bulk.

I might have go cold turkey as Tic Tacs consuming daily thoughts is just a little too weird for me.

Wednesday, February 01, 2006

Too Good to be True?

I get a phone call tonight, telling me that my name has been selected in a drawing I entered at this bridal show I went to a few weeks back. I vaguely recall entering this particular contest as I was signing up for a million things and trying to win tons of door prizes. I in fact won $100 towards the purchase of flowers from this one vendor (though the vendor has never actually gotten in contact with me about that).

So the lady on the phone said I'm guaranteed 1 of 3 top prizes.

1. $30,000 towards the purchase of a car or $25,000 cash or
2. A family vacation valued at $600 something or
3. $500 in cash

She also told me there is no obligation to buy anything. My prize is free. Um....what? I don't even know what company this was and the lady was unable to tell me when I would know which prize I'd won since she was only in the validation department. Validation department?

But anyway, they are sending me an orange envelope with the information in it and a 1-800 number to call to redeem my prize.

It sounds way too good to be true, right? It seems like some weirdo scam or something. I would be really shocked if I won a car or $25,000!

I'll probably win the "vacation" and it'll turn out to be some sales pitch for a timeshare or something.

It sounds very shady but I'll see what the orange envelope beholds.